U.S. Government in the 19th-century - Today!

Wow. So, if you enjoy stories about the incompetence of government bureaucracy, keep on reading.

So, they scheduled the work visa interview for me and Martina. (Shes' Czech, and we've already been successfully married on the marriage visa.) The interview's in Memphis. I just called them and said, "Hey, that's 4 hours driving away, isn't there something closer -- in Nashville, maybe?“ Apparently not. There's only one such USCIS center in Tennessee, and Gangland-Memphis is it.

So, never mind how it screws over pretty everyone without easy transportation -- at least the Greyhound is a relatively straight shot. (Although an 8-hour trip on Greyhound . . . blech.)

I had a second question, though. “ I don't have my birth certificate, but I do have my passport. Will they accept that document?“

The rep replied, “ Well, that depends on the center. You would have to schedule an interview to ask. Would you like me to schedule an interview?”

“No. I told you, I live four hours away. I'm not going to drive 8-hours round trip to ask one question. What's their phone number?”

“They don't have a phone.”

“What?”

“They don't have a phone.”

(repeat sequence twice, but add various interjections like "seriously?” and ”you got to be kidding me“)

"So, you're telling me THERE'S ABSOLUTELY NO WAY TO CONTACT THEM, SHORT OF DRIVING 8-HOURS ROUNDTRIP FOR AN INTERVIEW?“

"Yes.“

And you know what makes the situation worse? It takes between 5 and 30 days to order a birth certificate . . . meaning that it might not arrive in time for the interview.

Grrrrrrr. And double grrrrr.

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